“I Thought I’d Lost Her Forever”

A mother’s story of reclaiming her daughter from hate.

I never thought I’d be afraid of my own child.

She had always been strong-willed. Independent. Rebellious, even. But when she went off to college and started making cruel, hateful comments—about immigrants, about people of color

—I knew something was deeply wrong.

It only got worse. The clothes she wore. The music she listened to. The people she surrounded herself with. She wasn’t just acting out—she had joined a Neo-Nazi group. She found a boyfriend there. And then she cut off all contact with us.

She filed a restraining order against me.

I was devastated. I didn’t know how to help her. I didn’t know if I even could.That’s when I called Parents for Peace.

They didn’t judge me. They helped me understand how groups like this work—how they isolate, manipulate, and control. They explained how vulnerable young people, especially those who are neurodivergent, can be pulled in when they’re angry, hurt, or looking for belonging.

They didn’t try to fix her. They started by helping me.

I had to learn how to manage my panic—how to stop trying to force my way back into her life, and instead prepare for the moment she might come back on her own. They taught me how to listen. How to talk in ways that didn’t push her further away. How to rebuild trust without control.

And then the call came. She was pregnant. Her boyfriend—part of the same hate group—had become abusive. She was scared. She didn’t want him to have access to their child. She chose to terminate the pregnancy and come home.

She came back to me.

But coming home wasn’t the end. The work began again. Parents for Peace helped me see how some of her pain stretched back years—even to a moment I had ignored: a time when she told me about being harmed by someone I had trusted. I hadn’t believed her then. And that betrayal had stayed with her.

This time, I listened.

Slowly, she began to shed the beliefs that had consumed her. She covered up the look she had once adopted. She started looking for a job. She wasn’t just rejecting hate—she was finding herself again.

We still have a long way to go. But for the first time in years, I feel like I have my daughter back.